Internet comedian Vlad Putin and his victim, Evgeny "Zhenya" Prigozhin
Wagner Group leader and internet comedian Yevgeny Prigozhin was killed this week. It is a dark day for Russia, and the YouTube comedy scene. Prigozhin, who rose to international fame in June after his mutiny prank he pulled on Russian President Vladimir Putin went viral, lies in his grave, the cold Russian winter approaching. He will be missed, (we certainly had a nice laugh or two during our interview with the comedian), but his death raises an important question: has pranking gone too far? Indeed, Prigozhin's death appears to be the result of a retaliatory prank by none other than Vladimir Putin himself. Jealous of the acclaim Prigozhin was garnering, and no doubt humiliated from the prank made at his expense, Putin claimed responsibility for Prigozhin's death early this morning, at 4:20 AM. A single tweet read: "Hah. Goteem!" "The bomb on Prigozhin's plane was mine, yes. I decided to do this after Yevgeny's prank. We had a good laugh, sat back together, drank some vodka, and watched PrankInvasion on Youtube, like old times. We spent a lot of time together that night." The President sighed, and paused for a moment. His eyes floated to the ceiling, reminiscing fondly on the good old days with his back-then alive friend Yevgeny Prigozhin. "Sure, it hurt my feelings at first, but you can't stay mad at Zhenya (Russian diminituve, affectionate form of "Yevgeny"). He just has a way with these things. I admired him, really. And it was then that I decided. I would prank him back!" The President then went into detail on his plot, emphasizing how funny it would be if Prigozhin died screaming in an explosion on an airplane. He held back tears from laughing. But those of us in the room felt there may have been something else behind those tears. It was clear this man loved his friend. The kind of love that forms between men comfortable enough to prank each other like this. To be truly vulnerable for all to see. We held back tears ourselves. "I have to give credit where it's due, however. Ever since Zhenya showed me Joey Salads and PrankInvasion back in the day. I had secretly wanted to try out pranks myself. Where do you think I got the courage to try out the special military prank in Ukraine? I was watching PrankInvasion and I said to myself I said, 'Prank?' ... 'Invasion..?' That's when I knew we had to invade Ukraine, it would be the best prank of all time." We asked the President to please get back on topic. This article wasn't going to be about the situation in Ukraine. It was about comedy. The kind of nail-biting comedy that makes you think. Visionary stuff. Carlin, Pryor, Putin. These were the names we had on our list. Without a doubt, we had to hear more from the comedic genius. What did he think of his now smoldering rival? "He is funny guy, but he is also dead. Now that's funny!" Vlad Putin chuckled, as our reporters smiled. As it turns out, the only war Putin really, truly cares about, is The Prank War. Tune in tomorrow as we talk to the 7th grade science fair winner who made usable Zyklon-B, and the principal who bought his entire supply.
Brewer & Valentino, Kalkaska Chronicle
