Thousands of depressed Russians take to the streets in hopes they will be shot and killed by police
Suicide is sweeping the Russian nation this winter as seasonal depression sets in. Each year, more than 37,000 Russian citizens take their own lives via firearms, hanging, overdosing, and carelessly running for president. Following the special military operation in Ukraine and an economic collapse, Russian citizens have found their lives devoid of meaning, struggling to stay afloat. Many have decided they've had enough, turning to the ballot box to kill themselves. "My son, Dmitri, he was such a good boy... oh, my Mitya... he announced his candidacy this year. I knew he was in a bad way, but not like this..." -a Russian mother grieves for her son after deciding to kill himself. Not every Russian who attempts to kill himself running for president is successful, thankfully. Some accidentally put their name in the running for the State Duma, where they will pose no threat to themselves or anyone else, having effectively no power in the Russian state. Still, many more are successful, although some insist on suicide in more traditional manners. "Running for president? No, I prefer killing myself with a gun, or being seen on the same street as a protest on my way to work. They both get the job done. Less paperwork." Whatever Russians' choice is for killing themselves, the wave of suicide does not appear to be slowing anytime soon, as thousands announce their intentions to negligently opposite Putin this season. We can only pray for their souls.
Bernadette Brewster, Kalkaska Chronicle
